book 1 - FREE
In a perfect world, Lucas West would meet someone in one of the BDSM communities he was active in, someone who ached for a Daddy Dom as much as Lucas longed for a Little to care for. They would date, play, build something that was just for them, and share a future together.
In a perfect world, Colt Carter would get through his next deployment and then move closer to DC where he could create at least a semblance of a personal life. He wanted something outside of the Air Force, something kinky, something worth leaving everything behind for eventually. For years, he’d kept his inner Sadist and Daddy Dom locked up, only letting him out to play on rare occasions.
In a perfect world…
In reality, Lucas and Colt met each other.
Left all alone in the world—and in a very big house—after the loss of his parents, Kit Damien has struggled to find his place in society and in the kink community he longs to be a more active part of.
Daddy Doms Colt and Lucas have been a happy, committed couple for eight years. But two Tops need a bottom, and their quest for a Little to make their lives complete has led them to Kit’s empty doorstep.
But just as with his physical wounds, Kit’s emotional scars won’t heal overnight. Colt and Lucas must challenge him at every turn to force him to open up and let them in, to let them use their own individual methods to make him whole again. Together, the three will embark on a journey to learn about true love, growing up, the importance of sprinkles, and the rules of The Game that can make them all winners.
“Will you beat me without knowing the reason?”
That’s the question I ask when I go to clubs to seek out Sadists.
Most men say no immediately. They see the flags my question raises and walk away. They’re the good guys. They’re the guys who adhere to safe, sane, and consensual. They wanna be aware of the risks and cause no harm. But I’m not looking for a good guy. I’m looking for punishment.
The strobe lights hit me as I reach their table. The heavy, industrial music is deafening, and my head is swimming with images of grief, fire, and accusation. I hear the piercing tone of a machine letting me know that I have to tell my two kid brothers that our sister’s heart will never beat again.
Maybe these two twin Sadists will help me. The only thing bigger than River and Reese Tenley is their reputation. They better not let me down.
I ask my question. I ask if they’ll beat me without knowing why I want it.
They give me a stone-cold onceover, and I don’t know if it’s River or Reese who responds. He has a menacing-looking tattoo on his neck.
“Sure. It’s your funeral.”
This is the limited release of The Air That I Breathe, River and Reese's prequel, and can be best enjoyed after you've read Breathless when you've gotten to know the Tenley twins a bit better.
The only thing that stood between us were the boundaries set by others, by society, by our parents. But together we could knock them down. Together, we could find freedom and live life on our own terms. Screw the rest of the world. He was all that mattered. He was the air that I breathed.
I have the best boyfriend in the whole world, but there’s one thing I won’t tell him. It’s that I don’t believe in absolute happiness anymore. Not with the cards we’ve been dealt. I mean, come on! Why do we fall for people who don’t want us back? While he’s been pining after Lucian, one of the Masters in his kink community, I’m the lovesick monster-puppy Little who can’t forget my former stepdad KC. Or the kinky porn I once found on his computer…but that’s beside the point!
It’s complicated, to be honest. I try not to think about it. I have Cameron, and I love him so damn much. Why can’t we try to make it on our own? Why does he want us to find a Top that’s just ours? It won’t work. Our stupid hearts refuse to move on.
What’s even stupider is that Cameron insists we seek out a Dom for our relationship in the very kink community where we can find both KC and Lucian.
Ohhh crap. I think he’s got a plan.
We screwed up, Master.
It wasn’t until I stood there alone in the ashes, raw, naked, enraged, and in more pain than I could handle that I realized we’d been wrong from the beginning. I saw our history in the rubble—all our memories, the pictures filled with devotion and laughter, my wholehearted submission to him. And we had to rewrite the ending. We had to. Kingsley and I couldn’t be over. I missed him so much that it hurt to breathe. But we had burned out.
We will burn again, baby.
Our biggest mistake had been to put an expiration date on a love destined for eternity. We’d been blinded by our kinks not lining up perfectly. We’d let fears and insecurities rule in silence, and it was time to confront them head on. We were going to expose ourselves, push every limit, and reignite. Because Tate and I belonged in the fire. We played hard and loved even harder. I wouldn’t allow the unknown to terrify us, to restrict us, even if our new path was…unconventional. Even if we brought in someone else to light the match for us.
We’ll burn together.
I was fresh out of boot camp and somewhere in the desert when I started picturing what my life after the Marines would look like. I’d always wanted a big family and a place out in the sticks.
At forty-five, I could only scratch my head and wonder what the hell had happened. I knew I should be grateful. I had my farmhouse. Rescue dogs and chickens too. I had a rowdy bunch nieces and nephews. I had amazing friends. I’d started a kink community with some of them. But it killed me to come home to an empty house at the end of the day. It hurt that nobody seemed to be interested in anything beyond pain sessions and casual playtime. Even my best friend Sloan pulled away from me. He was struggling to make ends meet with four kids, and I had a big house. They should move in with me, dammit.
I guess it made perfect sense that after so many years of wondering, waiting, and grumbling, a single week changed it all. My “the one who got away” showed up at a kink event, and Sloan shared a drunken confession that screwed with my head.
It was time to improvise, adapt, and…start believin’ in pipe dreams.
On a bad day, I blamed my stupid, damaged, autistic brain. No one forced me to be with him. No one forced me to accept what he told me. That I was difficult. Difficult to handle, difficult to please…heck, even difficult to go out to dinner with, considering all my texture issues. On a bad day, I believed every word he said. I was lucky to have him. I loved him so, so much for putting up with me. I was gonna leave my friends and family behind, move with him to Denver, and we were going to be happy together forever.
Then Master Greer opened his big mouth, and I didn’t know what to believe anymore. He was my friend, my favorite Sadist in the whole world, and he was dating two amazing men who were also saying stuff that was painful to hear. Like, I wasn’t difficult at all. Like, the man who was supposed to protect me, love me, and take care of me in our Daddy/Little relationship was in reality abusing me.
I started having good days thanks to them. Good, bewildering, mind-numbing, eye-opening, very good days. It was just extremely important I didn’t get confused by their kindness. They opened up their home to me as an act of friendship. Nothing more, nothing less. As soon as I felt better, I’d be on my way again.
I was on the right path, at long last. The divorce proceedings were going well, we managed to keep things somewhat civil for the sake of our daughter, and I could finally be the man I’d suppressed for decades.
I was gay. And evidently very much into BDSM.
So this was the perfect time to explore, have fun, meet new people, make friends who were actually friends and not the husbands of my wife’s uppity circle of gossip peddlers. I was happy. I was off to a great start, distancing myself from the family I’d once married into.
Then my ex-wife’s favorite nephew came to town on a business trip and wanted to have dinner with me. Obviously, I should have declined. The young man had always put me on edge with his charisma and assertiveness. But surely, I could survive one dinner with Jackson Dune.
The day after was another matter. When we ended up going to the gym together and he showed his true colors. His true, filthy, dominant, addictive, inappropriate colors.
“Do you like to watch, Uncle Franklin?”
It’s been a long fall for the kinksters at Mclean House, but soon the house will finally be ready for action again. If anything, the fire only brought them closer as a community, and that’s how they’re mastering the rebuild—together.
They have one week to get the second floor finished for the upcoming event, Senseless, and there isn’t a minute to waste. But of course, hard work doesn’t mean there’s no time for the Sadists and the brats of Mclean to multitask and have a little fun too. Reese promises cuddles in the dark and possibly a ball gag, Kit is super-excited about a gift he’s won for Daddy Colt, Kingsley can’t help but picture a future with Tate in which they start a family, Noa has a bratty surprise, poor Greer is having his chest shaved for a frigid photo shoot—actually, so is Colt. Those about to watch are really looking forward to that.
I’m down to clown, as Corey would say!
Forty-five years on this planet. A prestigious career as a fighter pilot. A wonderful relationship with Lucas—nine years and counting. Decades of experience as a sadistic Daddy Dom in a community he’d helped start. And those corn-fed Texas genes too. Damn right, Colt Carter reckoned he was entitled to be assertive. Not a whole lot could rattle his cage.
Except Kit Damien, the young brat who’d turned Colt’s and Lucas’s lives upside down in the best ways the past six or so months. The two Daddy Doms had finally found their Little forever. But when Kit confessed to having certain fantasies, Colt had to admit, in some ways, he was still a beginner.
Good thing Santa was on his way. Santa knew exactly what to say. He was also a stellar partner in crime when the brats of Mclean House were up to no good and making secret plans for their holiday party.
Ho, ho, ho. Are there any naughty boys in the house?
Lane Sawyer had no complaints. Not really, anyway. After all, he’d just been invited to spend a week down in sunny Florida with his amazing boyfriend Macklin and some of his kinkster buddies. That was exactly what Lane needed. Uncomplicated fun and the promise of no drama—and hopefully a close encounter or two with the apex predator of the Everglades, the Burmese python. He loved, loved, loved reptiles.
But Florida was home to more than one apex predator. When Lane arrived, he found himself face-to-face with their host for the week, his high school girlfriend’s dad. The man who’d once made Lane realize he was into men.
Macklin McKenna couldn’t wait to get away. The problem was, he needed a vacation from himself more than DC. But maybe a week in South Florida with his friends and his adoring boyfriend Lane could distract him from the fact that he was never getting over the man he was still technically married to.
Unfortunately, Macklin’s friends were fed up with his personal agony, and they’d ensured another apex predator was on his way down South.
Lane, Macklin, Ty, and Walker are back in Prowl.
More to come soon